Who I am when you're not looking..

Dear boy,
There is this little side of me that you might not know yet. I dance around late at night with the blinds closed. I call my mom when life gets hard. I look at your text messages over and over. I drink juice from the carton. I take thirty minute showers sometimes. I look up endless house projects that I dream over. I giggle for hours when on the phone with my friends. I paint my toenails all different colors. I blare my radio with all its might when driving down the road. I laugh at myself over and over. I slide around on my hardwood floors when my pants are a little too long. Sometimes I watch too much tv and sit on the computer too long. I eat two cookies instead of one. I sit and pray you'll get to come over just a little earlier. I work out when I'm stressed. I cook things for others before I cook them for you. I play the air guitar. I wear baggy shirts and live for moments when no ones home so I can sit around in my undies.
I call my dad when I need advice. I let the dishes soak just a little bit too long in the dishwater. I blog. I pee with the door wide open. I email my little brothers silly little videos. I rearrange my fridge almost every other day. I curse out load when I'm upset.

Maybe someday you'll get to witness all of this in person.
Just maybe.

So, what are you doing when I'm not looking?

xoxo,
awna jade